Women and Headship

I appreciate the freedom I have in Christ, and the attitude our Lord had about women. He treated women with the same respect He did men, and in the first century AD, that was refreshing for them. Of course, the Bible teaches that women are to submit to their husbands. Men are to love their wives the same way that Christ loves the church (sacrificially), and to honor them as fellow heirs of Christ. That certainly would have been different from the status quo in the first century as well. 22 "Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything. 25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26 to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, 27 and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless"(Ephesians 5:22-27). 7 "Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers" (1 Peter 3:7). This is generally accepted in evangelicalism. However, the way these teachings are applied varies. Christians in the Reformed tradition tend to emphasize the aspect of the submission of women more than those in the Arminian tradition. I'm referring to emphasis, not acceptance of it as Truth. When I was a member of an independent church in the Reformed tradition I observed this especially in the baptism service. Men were allowed to baptize their children, or other family members, if they chose. In the case of a widowed or divorced mother, however, a man was assigned to do that for her. I appreciate the aspect of this that implies that the leaders of the church should care for the unattached women. I never checked to see if this extended to the man also teaching and leading that woman's children, rather than the woman herself doing that. 1 Corinthians 7:34-35 says "An unmarried woman or virgin is concerned about the Lord’s affairs: Her aim is to be devoted to the Lord in both body and spirit. But a married woman is concerned about the affairs of this world—how she can please her husband. 35 I am saying this for your own good, not to restrict you, but that you may live in a right way in undivided devotion to the Lord." One day when I was studying Biblical counseling, and we were on the topic of marriage, home, and related authority, I asked my professor about Biblical headship in the case of the single woman. He said there were two opinions, one being that the single woman would have to be under the headship of a Christian man. However, his opinion was that she would be under the direct headship of Jesus, the same as a man would. That is my opinion as well, based on 1 Corinthians 7:34. And this is how the Lord has dealt with me. In the independent, Reformed-leaning church mentioned above, if I asked someone for advice, they would open their Bible, and tell me what to do. Contrast that with an African Pentecostal church elder of whom I asked advice when I was a missionary. He said, "I can't answer that for you. You must rely on the Holy Spirit within you to guide you." You can see which one was more likely to help me learn how to rely on the Holy Spirit in the absence of a man. The first example would result in my always having to be dependent on a man. I believe this reflects a low view both of women, and of the Holy Spirit. I often was treated in a condescending manner in that church, and seldom felt like I had any dignity (though I was older than almost all of the leaders). And the only time the former pastor raised his voice in the pulpit was when he preached about women. Yet, I believe God places godly men in authority over me, and works powerfully through them. In fact, when He wants to do something significant in my life, he always connects me with a godly man who serves as an authoritative umbrella. Under his umbrella, I move about freely under the direct leadership of the Holy Spirit. This umbrella also serves as spiritual protection. This gives me dignity in Christ and is vastly different from the institutionalized condescension that was my lot at that Reformed-leaning church. It also has implications for women in ministry, but I'll reserve that for another time, since this blog is already too long.